Robert Smith's Wish Tour jokes


Richfield, 20th July 1992

- A cheese and tomato sandwich walks into a bar and says : "I'd like a beer please". The barman says "I'm sorry we don't serve food".

- Did you ever heard about the dyslexic devil worshiper that sold his soul to Santa... ?

- A man walks into a doctor's and says "Doctor my brother thinks he's an orange". And the doctor says "that's pretty worrying" and says "where is he ?". "Oh I brought it with me he's in my pocket."

Birmingham, 18th November 1992

A man goes into a pet shop :
- "I want to buy a pet."
And the bloke says : "I've some really nice puppies here".
- "No, I don't want a dog."
- "We've got really nice kittens."
- "No, I don't want a cat."
And as the blokes goes...
- "No, I don't want a bird."
- "What do you want as a pet ?"
- "A really fancy wasp."
- "We're sorry we don't sell wasps as pets here."
- "Well, you had one in the window the other week."